Sunday, April 19, 2009

Road Rage - Illinois version

On a recent trip I discovered this sign has absolutely no meaning what so ever to some drivers.

The stretch of road I experienced this on was Highway 24 from Paducah Ky. to the Georgia border. 260 miles of pure living hell for me because of a few drivers NOT following this simple sign.

It took me a little while to figure out just exactly what was causing the repeated bottlenecks along this stretch of highway. After following a pack of 20 vehicles for 40 miles, I finally found out.

It's lefty's.

Not left handed people mind you, but the motorist that think it is their god given right to travel down a busy highway and permanently stay in the left hand lane regardless of their speed.

Don't know why these people do this either the fear of being called slower or lacking the ability to change lanes, but my cruise control was off more than it was on.

So as a PSA and important driving safety tip, I have thought up a couple of tips that motorists can use to find out if they need to change from the left hand of the highway to the right.

First, traveling .001 to 1 mph ABOVE the posted speed limit does not automatically qualify you to reside in the left hand lane. Move to the right.

Second, if you glace up at your rear view mirror and the traffic behind you looks like the drive thru of Starbucks on free coffee day, you probally need to change lanes. Move to the right.

Third, if the traffic passing you out your passenger side window is equivelent to the traffic in the oppisite direction, you probally need to change lanes. Move to the right.

Lastly, If a black Chevy Avalanche with Illinois plates passes you in the right hand lane doing 89 mph, the driver giving you the double bird, and you can't read lips but it looks like every other word he is saying begins with a "F", you probably REALLY need to change lanes.

PLEASE move to the right.


Anonymous said...

Mr. Schultz - I happened to be driving back from Nashville just yesterday and experienced EXACTLY what you are talking about!!! Flipping morons. I begged for a vaporizing hood mounted laser most of our journey along I-24.

K Bentley

Jimmys Tool Box said...

Vaporizing hood mounted Laser...?


If I get some free time, I'll let you know what I come up with.

Thinking I could run it off of the flux capacitor.?

Anonymous said...

You should see how these fools in Hawaii drive, it's awful.